But how soon is too soon and is it OK to keep finances separate for ever?
With Valentine’s Day turning the spotlight on relationships, Canadian couples should not ignore how financial planning and management can make or break relationships.
The importance placed on how partners manage their money is highlighted in a new report, revealing that getting it wrong can be a major source of conflict between couples.
An Ipsos poll for BMO found that 83% of coupled Canadians think finances should be discussed early in the relationship, but how soon?
- 10% believe it’s appropriate within the first few dates
- 41% say it should be when the relationships becomes ‘official’
- 31% suggest it should happen when couples decide to live together
More than eight in ten said that they are financially compatible with their partner while a similar share said they have integrated their finances. One fifth believe that finances should be integrated as soon as the relationship becomes official, with around the same share saying they should never be integrated.
However, 35% said their partner spends too much money and 36% admit to not always being truthful with their partner about their own finances.
Around two-thirds say they share equal responsibility for initiating discussions about household finances (68%) and setting goals for their family (67%).
The things that would concern poll participants most about their partner’s finances are:
- mortgage debt (47%)
- credit card debt (38%)
- credit score (33%)
- differences in income (26%)
Working together
Kathleen Hurtubise, executive vice president at Connect First Credit Union, shared her insights with Wealth Professional last Valentine’s Day.
“When a couple sets goals together, there is a bit of natural negotiation that happens where each person has a chance to balance what is important to them, as an individual,” she said. “Imbalance of finances, financial burden, or financial information is the most common mistake and flashpoint for couples when it comes to money.”
When speaking with couples, advisors should ask questions about financial aspects that the partners may not have considered before, starting with the least talkative partner.
“Money is personal, and it can be surprising what comes out when we can get talking about the things that money enables,” Hurtubise says. “Opening up about the things that are important to each member of the couple, independently from one another, leads to better informed decisions when they need to face things as a unit.”
